Tag - awakening

Sometimes…

Sometimes it’s a chocolate and Netflix and biscuits and duvet or too many cigarettes sort of day.

We allow ourselves the luxury of not being the positive, proactive person that we were taught was the only sort of person that was worthy of love.

We allow ourselves to softly and tenderly accept the invitation to sink into our lazy, sadness and pull a warm velvet blanket of deep rest around our weary hearts.

We don’t always have to be shiny and bright and clear.

We allow ourselves to be a murky, clouded sky and let the gentle drops of release fall from our tired eyes.

Every cycle has it’s autumn, its time of falling leaves, it’s time of nakedness and vulnerability, its time of energy sinking down, down, down into the roots of being where it feels as if it will be gone for ever.

This embracing of our humanness is what is being asked of us right now.

We no longer need to fight it. No more shall we give ourselves a hard time for having a hard time.

We have stood alone and fought bravely for so long.  Now is the time to lay down our weapons for this is the new courage that is being asked of us;  the courage to be soft and kind with ourselves.

Can we surrender to this grey landscape?

Can we hold ourselves tenderly and compassionately?

Can we still love and honour our beauty even when the person we see in the mirror is not who we thought we should be?

Can we still have faith that everything is happening for the simple reason that it is time to shed more layers of who we thought we were?

Can we fully realise that this melancholy and weariness is an essential part of our journey home to wholeness?

Can we still trust even when those who said they would stand beside us are lost in the maze of their own desperate attempts to find love?

Sometimes it’s a chocolate and Netflix and biscuits and duvet or too many cigarettes sort of day.

And this too shall pass; but for now we rest and know that the wheel of life is turning as we master this new courage and when the purging is done, we shall rise again.

And say to ourselves with a new voice, with a depth and conviction not felt before:  ‘I Love you’.

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The Sacred Masculine – A New Man For A New Earth

Last night I was watching an action movie and noticed how the basis of the story-line was similar to so many other films that are all about action, adventure and the current paradigm of what it is to be a man.

In short the story-line was that the man loses his woman (usually in extremely unpleasant circumstances) and without the love of his life he becomes a lone wolf that is obsessed by his work which usually involves inflicting pain or death on others.

It horrifies me that this is the message that boys and young men are repeatedly bombarded with in subtle and not so subtle ways.  This type of man is strangely seen as something to aspire to. It is a man who shows very few feelings apart from a sort of righteous anger.  His communication is very limited and of course not only does he not show emotions but he never talks about them.  In my mentoring work with young men over the years I have observed a similar pattern.  Many young men struggle to speak of or express feelings and often the result of all the pent up emotions inside them is that at regular intervals it overflows like a shaken bottle of fizzy drink which has had the top unscrewed.  In this destructive state they usually inflict violence on others, smash their rooms up or punch walls etc. to inflict pain on themselves.  Other times this uncontrolled anger manifests as self harm through cutting or stealing a car and driving dangerously.  Another coping strategy to deal with this reservoir of unexpressed feelings is taking drugs. This was my chosen ‘medicine’ as it helps numb and anaesthetise the discomfort that is always present in the periphery of awareness.

In the movies, despite his strange and Neolithic behaviour this type of man is often portrayed as desirable to the leading woman in the story, who her-self seems to be as devoid of a healthy range of emotions as he is and is little more than a man in a ‘sexy’ female body!  These movies subtly encode this message into the psyche of our young men, women and those not so young men who are for the most part just boys in men’s bodies.

But the other thing that stands out for me, is that this story is also a telling of the myth of our time.  Just as the ‘hero’ in the movie lost his lover so has modern man lost touch with his feminine  he has lost the ability to feel and be love.  The masculine / feminine twin flame within most men (and women) is totally out of balance and distorted.  What remains of the healthy masculine is but a thin strand of what it really means to be a whole and healthy man; much of his masculine has become toxic and the denial of his feminine principles and qualities means that he is a stunted, ghost-like self which is a  fraction of his full sovereign and sacred potential.

Without the balance of the feminine, of the heart, of the ability to own , express and feel more fully man is lost and so he continues to inflict pain and suffering on others and the planet.  Instead of becoming a protector and the honourer of life he becomes the defiler and destroyer, an agent of death and suffering.

This is why I believe that the time of Sacred Masculinity has come.  It is the time for a new definition of what it means to be a warrior. It is time for a man who has the courage to make the epic journey back to his heart so that he may feel and awaken to the fullness of life; the man who knows that all life is sacred; the man who knows that everything is connected and that as he does to another he does to himself. Now is the time for a new type of hero for this movie we call Life.  It is the time of the Sacred Masculine – a new man for a New Earth.

 

If you know of a young man who is ripe for some mentoring you can find out more about my online sessions here:

Youth Mentoring / Empowerment

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Don’t Be Positive Be Real!

We live in a society that insists that we should strive for happiness and this is a valid aspiration but what we are not told is that in order to experience happiness we must also experience sadness.  To deny half of the rich landscape of human emotions is to deny life.

Until we fully surrender to the duality and polarity of this earth realm we cannot know unity and Oneness.  We came here to experience a rich blend of what it is to be human so that we might remember our divinity and yet while we numb, avoid and distract ourselves from the full experience of what it is to be human we remain in limbo.

Much of this is related to having the courage to make the epic journey from our heads back to our hearts where we become acutely attuned to our feelings and emotions. We were taught that good little girls were nice and that big boys don’t cry.  This conditioning is woven deeply into the fabric of our western culture and ironically is the result of massive amounts of suffering in the form of mental and physical dis-ease.

In her book Active Hope, Joanna Macey talks about how the first step to becoming fully committed to service is ‘feeling the grief of the world.’ When we have the courage to return to our hearts we cannot help but be deeply affected and moved by the suffering of children, women, men and all sentient beings.  When we feel this fully we cannot help but be moved to act from a place of love to alleviate the suffering in the world. If the suffering were not so normalised by the media as something that is unavoidable in our modern world we would initially be in a constant state of grief.  Injustice and suffering is usually portrayed as something happening in a far away land that we can do nothing about and has little do with us.  But this is not true.  We are all immensely powerful beings and small acts of kindness and service that are repeated consistently result in massive changes. Every thought, word and action affects the collective of humanity.  This growing awareness, raising of consciousness is what is happening now.  There is a quiet revolution of love taking place beneath the radar and largely ignored by the mainstream media.

It’s not that we are supposed to live in a constant state of grief because there is so much beauty and kindness in the world and the miracle of this being human is something to be grateful for and celebrated every day.  These senses, this incredible mind, these bodies that are each a microcosm of the infinite universe. It’s so massive and incredible that often it is hidden in plain sight until we begin to see with the eyes of the heart.

So I find myself often feeling a blend, a rope that is woven from two strands.  One is sadness at the extent of suffering that we humans perpetuate and the other is sheer joy and gratitude for this unfathomably magical human experience.  The key seems to be that we embrace all of it in its beautiful messiness.  The more we are able to do this the more alive we become and begin moving toward operating at our true potential as beings of light and power as well as flawed humans.  Instead of being engulfed by our emotions, by the inevitable ups and downs of life, we observe them with the innocence of the child of our being.

The more we can be real and honour all of our feelings the more we find peace and the energy that was locked away in denial and numbing and business can be spent on love in action as we go about our lives.  The aspiration to just ‘be positive’ will, in the long term, only cause suffering and is a disguised request to deny the fullness of life and our human experience. We are disempowered in this way and become obsessed with seeking happiness externally through material wealth, false status, external validation and power.  And when we can’t run from the discomfort of our feelings and are engulfed by depression or they manifest as illness we feel shame and guilt for not being positive; we give ourselves a hard time for having a hard time, which only exacerbates our suffering.

It is time to stop worshiping at the altar of positivity and get real.  Feel it all, embrace it all, for in so doing we paradoxically transform the intensity of the pain and we realise that this is it.  There is no promised land, ascension is here and now living from a balance between head and heart, a union of the divine twin flame masculine and feminine energy within each of us.  When we truly embody this a peace descends upon us and we know ‘that all is well and all manner of things shall be well’ and we return to alignment of who we truly are; our present state becomes more infused with love and compassion for ourselves and all our brothers and sisters.

Let’s not be positive, let’s embrace the negative too and watch them both dissolve because both are really just illusions of judgement, let’s have the courage to be real and feel and heal!

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Autumn Moments

The brambles, with their spiky tendrils now offer their sweet blackberries too.

Which will you choose?

What path will you take now that you have arrived here?

What treasures of heart and mind have you harvested these long summer days?

What roads have you traveled with sunshine and rain, through the labyrinth of thoughts and emotions?

Who are you now that you were not, before these summer moons had passed?

The adventure of this being human unfolds as we feel the turning of our leaves and a richness within that we have gathered from a collection of myriad moments. gifted to us to arrange and sort and sift through at our pleasure.

Do not miss the opportunity to witness, to observe, to drink in these moments. They are priceless for they are really all we ever have. Sacred moments that tumble and spin together like golden leaves caught in a swirling dance, only to be blown from our memories, though they still leave a subtle trace in our hearts.

O the fleetingness of these moments, the fragility of breath, the beauty, the ugliness, the distorted and the magnificent, the pain and the sheer joy of this human existence at this autumn time.

The cool morning air from the open window is felt upon my human edges.

My skin feel s and my heart feels and all of my body is awash with sensations, tingling, humming, vibrating; I am energy dancing;  fast and frenetic and a slow gentle waltz.

And though the boughs of my life feel heavy at times for they are laden with juicy apples,  this heaviness is welcome for there is a weight of certainty behind my knowing that all is well.

The air is cool and yet the sun will rise again, there will be warmth before the light fades and this day is also done.

The wheel of life keeps on turning and I will watch and learn and feel, ever more fully, more deeply, more gratefully, knowing the sacredness of these autumn moments.

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The Rising of the Sacred, Primal Masculine

I feel it rising in me as I deepen my rewilding.  My embracing of my humanness, the earthiness, the darkness deep within the earth is within me too and it is welcome for it will not be denied. It has not always been this way for me and so as I change, I see this changing and rising in brothers that I know too. I am witnessing this masculine energy being purified in women also.  Beneath the thin veneer of male or female bodies we are genderless in the dance of divine masculine and feminine energies.

We are all doing our best and it is a hard road to travel at times. When all the external forces and internal voices of fear attempt to hold us back, to keep us in the false distorted ideas of what a man or a woman is.

I see that central to mans journey to sacred masculinity is to have the courage to feel that which we were afraid to feel. To leave the realm of the head and return to the kingdom of the heart, to transform the old pain so there is potential to experience Life in a way that we never thought possible; to realise that we have been asleep for so long, imprisoned behind the numb bars of the mind.
In the deepest darkest scariest places is where our treasure lies. The feelings of past unexpressed feelings are that dark cave and the treasure is guarded by dragons. But the dragons are actually beautiful when we get to know them, when we begin to dance with fear and ride on the back of dragons miracles happen!

There are millions of wounded men who had no role models, we were shamed by fathers and mothers, our fathers were absent or beat us or mocked us. We were taught that big boys don’t cry so all our pain got locked away. My step mother used to say to me ‘I’ll give you something to cry for.’ when I cried and she would hit me. My tears still do not flow as freely as I would like them to. 🙁

We men need the kindness, compassion and understanding of woman because we too have been abandoned, abused and left feeling lost and disoriented. That doesn’t mean that women should take any shit off us either!! There is a place for soft and tough Love.

Remember that the work we do to reunite the divine masculine and feminine within each of us is not just for ourselves. We are creating a new template for the children and the generations to come. It may take generations before True Love between man and woman becomes the norm but the journey IS the destination. And it may happen in a moment too! We do this work for us and to serve the collective and the innocent children to come. We are the trailblazers and doing this work is a good way to spend our precious time here on planet earth!!

The primal Shakti infused masculine is rising. We men our now give ourselves permission to embody all aspects of sacred masculinity.
Keeping the faith and keeping our hearts open is key. Let’s not make man or woman the enemy. Let’s keep nurturing our tender strength and compassion for ourselves and our brothers and sisters as we continue walking each other home.  We either do this all together or not at all. Namaste <3

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The Door is Open But Will You Step In?

What we perceive with our five senses of touch, smell, sight, taste and hearing is just the very tip of the ice-berg. There is much more ‘going on,’ much more data available in each moment than we can experience with the limitations of these human senses even though they are miraculous in themselves. If you need evidence of this just consider a bird on the lawn listening for the movement of worms beneath the surface. We can’t hear what a bird can hear because of the narrow band range within which our hearing operates. But never the less it exists. The same can be said of our smell if you consider how a dog can smell things from a distance that we cannot.  Nature provides endless evidence that there is more going on than we are aware. Wifi, electricity and radio waves etc are all invisible to our eyes but never-the-less we know they exist.  So this begs the question: What else is going on beyond the limitations of our senses?  The answer is that there are infinite possibilities and to begin to feel deeply into the miracle and mystery of life we must be open to this ‘not knowing’.

Secondly we need to be aware of the limitations of our minds. It seems to me that what we can perceive with our minds is possibly just a small puddle and beyond our usual human mind perception is an infinite ocean.  This is what Hesse alluded to in his book ‘Beyond The Doors Of Perception.’ It is ignorant and arrogant to believe that what we can comprehend is the totality of what actually exists. This is what Einstein was referring to when he said ‘Imagination is greater than knowledge,’ because first something new must be birthed or arrive in our minds through imagination but where does that idea or thought arrive from?  I suspect that it arrives from ‘beyond the veil’ of what we can ‘get our heads round’. This is in essence the dance of the masculine and feminine or yin and yang as the feminine is constantly birthing or manifesting creation in its myriad forms and that from which this arises is the masculine principle or consciousness.  From the emptiness comes fullness. Form moves and is birthed from stillness.  If we are able to entertain this truth, this then logically offers the question ‘what else lies beyond the veil?’  I propose that the answer is infinite possibilities.  And remember that infinity is rather large and itself is something else that we can’t really comprehend with our minds!

There is a bigger unknown picture that we are part of.  Perhaps it is time to really KNOW this and to walk through the door of perception. It is always open. <3

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